Dad jokes are notorious for being cheesy and oftentimes, cringe-worthy. But there’s something endearing about them that we just can’t help but love. Maybe it’s the dad’s earnest attempt at being funny or maybe it’s just the fact that dad jokes are so bad, they’re good. Whatever the reason, dad jokes have become a staple in today’s humor culture.
So without further ado, here are some of the best dad jokes:
1. Why did the tomato turn red? because it saw the salad dressing!
2. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
3. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
4. Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
5. Two goldfish are in a tank. One turns to the other and says, “Do you know how to drive this thing?”
6. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
7. Want to hear a construction joke? Oh, never mind. I’m still working on that one.
8. I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands.
9. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
10. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the park? They woke up.
While these jokes may not be for everyone, there’s no denying that they have a certain charm to them. Dad jokes may be predictable, but they always seem to put a smile on our faces. So next time you hear a dad joke, don’t groan – just embrace it and enjoy the silliness.
Here are more from Woman’s Day:
Best Dad Jokes of All Time
- What do you call it when a snowman throws a tantrum? A meltdown.
- Why did the baby strawberry cry? His parents were in a jam.
- How do you follow Will Smith in the snow? You follow the fresh prints.
- What does a sprinter eat before race day? Nothing, they fast!
- Where do you learn to make a banana split? Sundae school.
- Why don’t pirates take a bath before they walk the plank? Because they’ll just wash up on shore later.
- How do you stop bulls from charging? You cancel their credit cards.
- Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
- Why did Snoop Dogg bring an umbrella? For drizzle.
- How did the hipsters burn their tongues? They drank their coffee before it was cool.
- Why did the cracker go to the hospital? Because it felt crummy.
- Why did the dad toss his clock out of the window? He wanted to see time fly.
- What did one toilet say to the other? You look flushed.
- What did the drummer dad name his twin girls? Anna one, Anna two!
- What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing — it just waved.
- Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe.
- Why did the golfer bring two pairs of socks? In case he got a hole in one.
- What does a busybody pepper do? It gets jalapeno business.
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because it was outstanding in the field.
- Can you tell dad jokes if you don’t have kids? If you’re a faux pa.
- How do you tell if a vampire is sick? See if it’s coffin.
- My wife yelled at me for having no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.
- How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.
- When’s the best time to make a dentist appointment? Tooth-hurtie.
- When is a door not a door? When it’s actually ajar.
- What does a vegan zombie eat? Graaaaains!
Contributing Writer
Alesandra is a digital travel and lifestyle journalist based in Los Angeles whose work has appeared in Good Housekeeping, Woman’s Day, Prevention, Insider, Glamour, Shondaland, AFAR, Parents, TODAY and countless other online and print outlets. Alesandra has a masters degree in journalism with an emphasis on cultural reporting and criticism from NYU, and a bachelor’s degree from UC Berkeley. An avid traveler, she trots the globe with her husband and their twins.